The Dear Journal Experiment
by BrochanInWords
Summary: Arthur realizes two things: One, sorcerers smell like rotten eggs. Two, other sorcerers smell like peppermint. He decides to journal each time he smells either one, but sometimes, it just doesn't make any sense. Like how often Merlin smells like peppermint. (Crack! No warnings)
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: So, this came to me while reading a Michael Scott book and I just couldn't push it away... *Laughs* I hope you enjoy, feedback is always wonderful!**

Sometimes, Arthur smelled peppermint. Not just peppermint, but the kind of minty scent that burns deep into the back of your sinuses and leaves your eyes watering and your nose longing for something mild to smell instead. He realized over the years that oddly, this smell seemed to emanate from magic-users. He remembered a time when one woman had been taken to the stake to be burned, and as she was led through the courtyard the fragrance wafted all the way up to the balcony where he and Uther stood. It was strange, yes, but he hadn't spent too much time questioning it. That is, until it happened more often, one time it was a young boy, sometimes it would be as he talked with a specific person, so on and so forth until he wondered if there was something wrong with him because _sorcerers_ didn't _smell_ like _anything_ but _normal_ people.

Then, he smelled sulfur. It made his stomach twist and lurch, threatening to dump all of his breakfast, lunch or dinner (whichever had been closest to each time he smelled the rotting eggs) onto the ground. The nasty smell would be overwhelming and usually came just before something terrible happened, and usually the terrible thing was related closely to a sorcerer. The putrid aroma was distracting and confusing, considering that it had no reason to be there and come on as sudden as it always seemed to. So, over the years, he noticed these smells coming on out of the blue and always in the company of someone with special abilities.

There were times, though, when one or both of these scents came at random moments when there was absolutely _no_ sorcerer around.

S _o what_ if Arthur had started making a journal of all the times he smelled peppermint or rotten eggs? It wasn't odd, it was simply an observation. One of his tutors, Mr. Fley, who had taught him the science of the stars, had always said to him, "Experiment with everything, trust nothing". That is exactly what he did, but the conclusions he came to were inconclusive and ridiculous. He really, really didn't understand the dynamics in these circumstances, but he was willing to try to change that.

He wasn't sure if his findings would make Mr. Fley proud or would make him cry from shame.

He picked up his quill pen and went to write his first journal entry.

* * *

 _Day One_

 _Scenario one: Merlin And I In The Hallway._

 _I was walking down the corridor in the east wing after a meeting with Father._

 _Merlin, bumbling idiot that he is, was trailing along after me with the same load of laundry I had made him carry from the morning until well after lunch time, because, well, who wouldn't enjoy seeing him struggling to haul around a pile of laundry bigger than his whole torso while tripping over his own feet, peeking over and around the pile to make sure he was still on Arthur's tail, and falling down stairs?_

 _It was the highlight of my day._

 _...I digress._

 _At any rate, I smelled that blasted peppermint._

 _There was no one else in the corridor, just myself and my manserv_ _ant._

 _There was no sorcerer. Still, I smelled peppermint clearly, and therefore went to searching every inch of the hallway. Merlin fell over (Very funny) at least three times during the minutes that I searched for the reason that I could detect mint. (Very very funny.)_

 _I actually, at one point, may have sniffed the man's face. The scent was stronger there. Maybe Merlin spoke with a sorcerer and didn't know it? Worse - what if they_ kissed _him? That smell was awfully close to Merlin..._

 _Not that anyone would kiss Merlin._

 _They must have slapped him._

 _That was more likely._

 _(Side note, Merlin looked both terrified and disgusted by the fact that his master had taken to sniffing his cheek. Another highlight of my day, unnerving him. Come to think of it, most of the highlights of my days involve Merlin. Not to say I'd say so._ _)_

 _Either way, I just **couldn't figure this one out.**_


	2. Chapter 2

**_Dedicated to Pezzz._**

 _Day Five_

 _Scenario two: Everyone In The Throne Room And Merlin In The Afternoon_

 _I was in the throne room with the court, discussing our strategy for the skirmishes breaking out on the border between our patrols and Cenrid's. I didn't think that this would be the day for another experiment entry, but, sometimes I'm wrong. **Sometimes**. Merlin would argue that it's more than just sometimes, but, considering he's a falling-down drunk with a death wish, I don't usually listen to his insults, especially since they are only suited to the man himself._

 _Dollophead: Merlin has a small head and it's filled entirely with air._

 _Prat: Merlin is a blundering idiot. Point made._

 ** _Clotpole: Merlin -... I won't even get into that one._** _(No amount of extra ink will blotch out that sentence. Maybe my parchment is enchanted. Snort.)_

* * *

 _The smell of peppermint and Sulfur filled the room, which was odd, firstly because I have only ever detected one at a time and secondly because no one else seemed to take notice of this. Am I imagining this? No, because in the past, something to do with a sorcerer always follows those scents. If I'm the only one who can smell them, though, maybe there's something wrong with **me**. There is no such thing as the 'gift of smelling out warlocks'. Anyway, the sulfur smell was strongest around Morgana and the Peppermint strongest around Merlin. Today, it was even stronger than usual - maybe that's because Merlin usually smelled like horse manure, Gaius' herbs and sweat._

 _Was Merlin in danger? Did he know a sorcerer personally? I have to come back to that conclusion, because it's making sense. Morgana must know one as well, but a different one, because her fragrance is the sulfur while Merlin's is peppermint._

 _Anyways, I spoke to Merlin about it later when he was filling my bath._

 _He gave me a weird look and then said I should talk to Gaius about that, and it's probably a health concern. Well, he just doesn't understand. It's not a health concern. It must be some kind of, I hate to say it, but, I'm going to; power._

 _The power to sniff out witches and warlocks._

 _Humorously, when I saw Merlin later it appeared as though he had rolled in plants and purposefully covered himself in animal dung. I knew he was weird, but he just gets weirder each time I see him. Even funnier than the thought of his idiocy was the fact that I had wanted him to accompany me in greeting nobles that had traveled from a talk with Cenrid's appointed advisers and had just returned from that._

 _He stood behind me, doing his best not to overwhelm them with his stench._

 _Which was why I decided to push him out in front of myself and tell the nobles that my manservant, Merlin, would help them settle in again and would attend to their ever need._

 _I don't know who looked sicker, the nobles from Merlin's smell, or Merlin from the thought of more work while smelling like a literal pig._

 _Either way._

 _I'm determined to figure out who Morgana and Merlin know._

 _Because no sorcerer will harm either of them - not if I have anything to do with it, and, It is up to me._

 _I am the only one who can save them from the sorcerer(s)._

 _As a side note to self - it could be that witches smell like either peppermint or sulfur and the warlocks smell like the other. Look into it._


End file.
